The Following is an example of the excuses one has to come up with when, after
20 years he allows himself to be conned into the old trap of making a "guesstamate"
Peg,
may I call you Peg? If you don't enjoy reading a lot of senseless
blather then just cut to the chase and go to the bottom of this e-mail.
If, on the other hand, you have a little time to waste; by all means....read
on.
Definition:
"Guesstamites":
tiny critters that get into the hair of the head and the backsides of
contractors, sub-contractors, and their related pencilpushers, the estimator.
(Even those who are bald can have a head full.) Whenever one of these
types of people is asked to "Just give me an idea what it might
run....ball park....I won't hold you to it." a chemical is released
by the brain which causes the guesstamites on his head and in his pants to go
into a frenzy of itchy activity which in turn causes the person, now known the
world over as a fool, but who is kindly called a "Guesstamator", to
go into a mental stupor and stand there scratching his head, or his rear end,
trying to figure out how to pull a number out of the air quickly enough to
keep from looking like a complete idiot, and, hopefully, just
happen to get one that doesn't later reveal the fact that he is a
complete idiot.
I hate guesstamites. Like the termites
eating my house, guesstamites have always eaten my lunch. And so I bring
you good news and bad news....I know: you want the good news first.
Well, the bad news is that I was not high
enough on the price I gave you Friday last in Whispering Pines.
The good news is that I wasn't far off (in
dollars that is...only 35). It only really stinks when you view it as a
percentage (310 divided by 275 equals 1.13 or 13%).
The only thing worse that being 13%off on Friday would be if it
were Friday the 13th.
If you skipped to the end of the page the
price is $310.00.
If you read the whole thing the price is
$310.00.
You have our phone numbers, just call if you want us to proceed.
Thanks, Dean Banakes
CEO, Albemarle Glass Co., Inc.